The Quotable Action Hero

2009-10-13T11:35:00.000-07:00

Hell sucked! We are back!

- Dolph Lundgren, Showdown in Little Tokyo

2009-10-13T11:31:00.000-07:00

Before we let you leave, your commander must cross that field, present himself before this army, put his head between his legs, and kiss his own arse.

- Mel Gibson, Braveheart

2009-10-13T11:19:00.000-07:00

I only shot you in one foot. Hobble to the hospital.

- Steven Seagal, The Glimmer Man

2009-07-10T09:14:00.000-07:00

Personnel? That's for assholes!

- Clint Eastwood, The Enforcer

2009-07-10T09:10:00.000-07:00

There's a monster in your chest ... It's a really nasty one. And in a few hours you're gonna die. Any questions?

- Sigourney Weaver, Alien: Resurrection

2009-06-04T18:50:00.001-07:00

For 350,000 dollars, I'd fuck anything once.

- Steven Seagal, On Deadly Ground

2009-05-27T14:13:00.000-07:00

One night you'll close your eyes, and when they open I'll be there. It'll be time to die.

- Chuck Norris, Invasion USA

2009-05-27T14:09:00.000-07:00

The blood from your whole body goes to your head... it stops there... never comes down. But soon, it will come out of your nose, your ears, and even your eyes... and then... you will die... painfully...

- Jet Li, Kiss of the Dragon

2009-05-26T10:28:00.000-07:00

Listen, punk. To me you're nothin' but dogshit, you understand? And a lot of things can happen to dogshit. It can be scraped up with a shovel off the ground. It can dry up and blow away in the wind. Or it can be stepped on and squashed. So take my advice and be careful where the dog shits ya!

- Clint Eastwood, Sudden Impact

2009-05-26T08:56:00.000-07:00

I am gonna ask you questions. And every time you don't give me answers, I'm gonna cut something off. And I promise you, they will be things you will miss.

- Uma Thurman, Kill Bill Vol. 1

2009-05-24T16:21:00.001-07:00

You're a funny man, Sully, I like you. That's why I'm going to kill you last.

- Arnold Schwarzenegger, Commando

2009-05-21T21:04:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I want some blow. Put your hands where I can see 'em or I'm gonna blow your head off.

- Steven Seagal, Marked For Death

2009-05-21T20:05:00.000-07:00

When I look at you, I have a wet dream.

- Jackie Chan, The Tuxedo

2009-05-20T15:48:00.000-07:00

Drop that zero and get with the hero!

- Vanilla Ice, Cool as Ice

2009-05-18T20:08:00.000-07:00

That look on your face would turn good whiskey into sour piss.

- Lee Marvin, Death Hunt

2009-05-18T19:42:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I got a deal for you. Crawl out from that rock you're hiding under, and I'll drive this truck up your ass.

- Bruce Willis, Die Hard With a Vengeance

2009-05-10T18:23:00.000-07:00

Fuck with me, buddy, I'll kick your ass so hard you'll have to unbutton your collar to shit.

- Clint Eastwood, The Dead Pool

2009-05-10T18:13:00.000-07:00

Don't judge a comic book by its cover.

- Vin Diesel, XXX

2009-05-09T11:56:00.000-07:00

Let me tell you something. If anybody else gets hurt on that plane... it's gonna take a hell of a lot more than a prison cell to keep me from ripping your fucking nuts off.

- Wesley Snipes, Passenger 57

2009-05-09T11:42:00.001-07:00

You're terminated, fucker.

- Linda Hamilton, The Terminator

2009-05-08T20:55:00.000-07:00

Never drum on a white lady's boobies at a big redneck dance. Got it.

- Will Smith, Wild Wild West

2009-05-08T19:30:00.001-07:00

The correct term is Babes, sir.

- Keanu Reeves, Point Break

2009-05-06T23:16:00.000-07:00

Imagine the future, Chains, 'cause you're not in it.

- Brian Bosworth, Stone Cold

2009-05-06T16:36:00.001-07:00

This ain't my year. Here's a pimp, patio full of whores ... I'm the one getting fucked ... nah!

- Isaac Hayes, Truck Turner

2009-05-05T19:47:00.000-07:00

You want my vote for the Psycho Hall of Fame, asshole? You got it!

- Kurt Russell, Tango & Cash

2009-05-05T19:28:00.000-07:00

I hate this place. I hate penis-eating minnows and I hate freaky fruit. I want to go home.

- Dwayne Johnson (as The Rock), The Rundown

2009-05-04T20:19:00.000-07:00

I hear all sorts of bullshit everyday, pal. You want some advice? Take your fancy clothes and your black silk underwear and go back to Disneyland.

- Jean-Claude Van Damme, Double Impact

2009-05-04T20:11:00.000-07:00

The last guy that made fun of my hair is still trying to pull his head outta his ass.

- Dennis Rodman, Double Team

2009-05-04T20:07:00.000-07:00

Yeah, and I'm from my dad's penis. Now fuck off.

- Andrew Dice Clay, The Adventures of Ford Fairlane

2009-05-04T20:03:00.000-07:00

Yes! You will be welcome in Zukuru! The head man's locust bean cakes -- they will be your locust bean cakes! His fermented buffalo milk will be your fermented buffalo milk!

- Tanya Roberts, Sheena

2009-05-03T19:58:00.000-07:00

When I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you.

- Chuck Norris, Code of Silence

2009-05-03T18:39:00.000-07:00

I eat Green Berets for breakfast. And right now, I'm very hungry!

- Arnold Schwarzenegger, Commando

2009-05-03T18:35:00.001-07:00

So many assholes. So few bullets.

- Andrew Dice Clay, The Adventures of Ford Fairlane

2009-05-03T18:29:00.000-07:00

Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane!

- Samuel L. Jackson, Snakes on a Plane

2009-05-03T11:01:00.000-07:00

My instincts are to wax your ass all over this floor!

- Wesley Snipes, Passenger 57

2009-05-03T06:57:00.000-07:00

I’ll shove that bat up your ass and turn you into a popsicle.

- James Remar, The Warriors

2009-05-02T20:26:00.000-07:00

She's got a great body. She makes you want to buy rubbers.

- Mel Gibson, Lethal Weapon 2

2009-05-02T17:37:00.001-07:00

I'll kill you with my teacup.

- Vin Diesel, The Chronicles of Riddick

2009-05-02T10:28:00.000-07:00

Sounds like you’ve had a hard life. Good thing it’s over!

- Steve Austin, The Condemned

2009-05-02T10:27:00.000-07:00

I'm still kicking. I must be on Broadway.

- Jean-Claude Van Damme, Timecop

2009-05-02T08:53:00.001-07:00

I always wanted to be a milk shake.

- Sylvester Stallone, Over The Top

2009-05-02T08:23:00.000-07:00

Is looking like a constipated warthog a prerequisite for getting a job in the art world?

- Bruce Willis, Hudson Hawk

2009-05-01T21:10:00.000-07:00

A little fishing town about 80 miles north of Anchorage. You've probably heard of it. It's called Fuck Your Momma.

- Steve Austin, The Condemned

2009-05-01T19:06:00.001-07:00

You wanna cut my throat, go ahead. You wanna cut my fuckin' head off and use it for a fuckin' basketball? You can bowl with the motherfucker for all I care! Just don't let HIM do it! I don't wanna get killed by this limey, immigrant JERKOFF! I wanna get killed by an AMERICAN jerkoff!

- Kurt Russell, Tango & Cash

2009-05-01T18:44:00.000-07:00

Thanks a lot you shit-brained, fuck-faced, ball breaking, duck fucking pain in the ass.

- Sylvester Stallone, Demolition Man

2009-05-01T12:43:00.000-07:00

What's on the menu tonight? The old blowtorch-to-the-family jewels routine, I'll bet. Hey, you want roasted nuts, let's break out the Planters.

- Vin Diesel, XXX

2009-05-01T09:05:00.000-07:00

I live to see you eat that contract, but I hope you leave enough room for my fist because I’m going to ram it into your stomach and break your goddamn spine!

- Arnold Schwarzenegger, The Running Man

2009-05-01T07:17:00.000-07:00

It's the Collection Agency, Bison. Your ass is six months over due, and it's mine.

- Jean-Claude Van Damme, Street Fighter

2009-05-01T07:03:00.000-07:00

I'm gonna take you to the bank. To the blood bank.

- Steven Seagal, Hard to Kill

2009-05-01T06:52:00.000-07:00

Screw the world. If I'm gonna die for something, it better be bitches and money.

- Vin Diesel, XXX